It’s January 1st! Happy New Year 🙂 And with every new year, comes New Year’s resolutions. You either love them or hate them. At one point in our life, I’m sure we’ve all made one. Maybe we stuck to it and maybe we didn’t, but the point is that we were aware that we wanted to change something. We wanted to see growth within us.
Some common resolutions include:
- less time on social media
- less cursing
- lose x amount of pounds
- eat healthier
- stop smoking
- less alcohol
- more gym time
- more family time
- be a nicer person.. 😉
What this blog post is meant to do is shine some light on the fact that these are all nestled under one very simple but also very complex concept:
If we all made our resolution to love ourselves more instead, we would see CRAZY good changes in any area in our life that we also want to be improved. I know this doesn’t make sense.. how could loving myself help me stop smoking? help me eat better? help me be a better girlfriend, a better mom, or a better daughter? I’ll break it down as part of personal experience.
When I look back on my life, I remember the really hard times. I did not feel comfortable in my skin. I was going through extremely low self-esteem problems. I did not love myself. I didn’t feel good about who I was. I didn’t take the time to give myself me time, go to the gym, eat right, relax, do yoga, and I drank a looooot. That’s what I thought I deserved.
I also remember during that time that it was reallllllly hard for me to be the loving individual that I was to others. Why? I was pouring from an empty cup. It wasn’t that I cared less or hated people. I was drained. My dad would say something to me and I would snap. Often. You see, I looked in the mirror and didn’t like who I was, so I walked around with that. It’s really hard to be a ray of light to others when you can’t even look in the mirror and be a ray of light for yourself. Now, I’m not saying it’s impossible. Because it’s been done. I’ve done it. But, it’s so much harder when you don’t come from a place of loving who you are and realizing what you deserve.
I then look back on my life and think of when I got the help that I needed and learned self-compassion, self-awareness, self-appreciation… I was feeling so much better! And I wanted to keep on feeling better. I did yoga, drank more tea, relaxed, fed myself better, went out and surrounded myself with people more, was a better daughter, a better cousin, a better everything, all because I loved myself and had more love to give to others. If someone said something to me that I didn’t like, I didn’t react as quickly. I had so much love in me, it didn’t affect me. I was pouring from a full cup in everything that I did. And I had a full cup of love in everything that happened to me, so I barely felt the effect of others’ doings.
When I wake up and feel horrible about myself and am having a very low mental health day, I’m less likely to give people compliments, I’m less likely to be present, to be social, to be inspired, to ask everyone I can, “How can I help?”
When I wake up feeling good about myself, I look in the mirror and say, “Hi beautiful. You’ve been through so much and look at you now. I’m so proud of you. Let’s have a awesome day doing things that nourish you.. you deserve it.” I walk around lighter. I radiate positive energy. I’m more aware of my habits.. of the things I know I can grow on. I’m self-aware and self-compassionate. I know what I deserve.
Again, I’m not saying that you can’t quit smoking, eat healthier, or lose weight without loving yourself. But, it is most definitely going to be so much harder than it needs to be. If you wake up in 2018 and realize that you do in fact love who you are before you lose those 15 lbs, before your skin clears up, before you get a boyfriend, you will see that it will be much easier to lose that weight, clear that skin, and get that boyfriend. There are no pre-requisites to loving yourself. And you attract what you are. So, if you take on life as a person that loves themselves, you will radiate the energy of knowing your worth. And you will attract someone that will love you like you deserve to be loved. It’s as simple and complex as that 😉
So, what are some acts of self-love and self-care that you can take on TODAY?
The above are common acts people think of with self-care, but there are always the more subtle acts that can’t be represented by pictures such as:
- saying no to plans when your gut tells you to
- not eating something just because someone wants you to
- letting go of toxic people in your life
- communicating assertively what you deserve from someone who isn’t giving you that
- quitting the job that makes you miserable as long as you have the support you need
- telling yourself positive affirmations when your self-esteem needs a little boost
- asking for help when you can’t take it anymore
- and many, many more!
My most recent act of self-love and self-care was staying in when everyone expected me to go out because I wasn’t feeling well.
This was me, last night, on New Year’s Eve with my baby in my pj’s:
It took a lot for me to cancel my plans and stay in to take care of myself. But, I did it. Because my new year’s resolution is to love myself more. From that foundation, I will go to the gym more, do yoga and meditate more, and drink more water all as an amazing “side effect.”
Now that you know my New Year’s resolution, tell me yours! 🙂
Happy 2018 my friends! Be well and take care of yourself because you deserve it ♡